It is David Lynch’s Birthday and My Friends Have Never Seen Mulholland Drive
When David Lynch made Mulholland Drive he was 54. I think of Naomi Watts and I think she might be the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, except for my roommate after that one party, filling up the armchair. Naomi Watts lesbian sex scene Mulholland Drive and the Google Search won’t autofill. Naomi Watts tits out Mulholland Drive, set the Safe Search to Off. I knew what it was like to be the dyke who’d get left for a man. I never saw destiny spelled out for me until I saw that film. The singing, full-bellied, full-throated, the shouting in Spanish, the lovers that look like twins, I always thought –– how romantic to look exactly like someone else. Except I didn’t realize the bum in the alley behind the diner was a bum. I thought it was a monster. And so it was all much more otherworldly than it even seemed and it stayed that way to me for a very long time.
Breastplate Prayer
Will he marry me
Will we divorce
Will i stop writing
Will i lose myself in love
Will i have children
Will i loosen my temper with them
Will i am interested in their small lives
Will divine truth prevail
Will i cross through the doorway of boredom
to something on the other side
Will my spiritual life be rich
Will we pray before dinner
Will for a big backyard and a shrine in the foyer
Will the horse
Will the heroin
Will something like bacon and syrup in the morning
Will I be delivered from evil
Will I am delivered from evil
Schmuck
We meet our old friends at the bar where my favorite cocktail
has blue cheese and banana and coffee. Friends from our college
I didn’t know them too well. Leaving was like leaving a panopticon
I didn’t know I was in. My roommate knows them better and I nurse
the drink not to say something wrong. During the day the bar is a café
where you can get a good Americano or long black, with 14 calories,
or so the menu says. The cocktail is interactive which means I get
to add the blue cheese myself but today it is gross. In food just like in sex
I hate too many textures. I think of in meditation or in sleep when
my body produces enough heat to warm both me and another. I think
of stepping out from the subway. For a second only being able to see sky.
When I Know How to Put It All Together I Will
The shell of a cone snail
The cells of a shone kale
The show of a swelled sail
There’s no snow in Mexico
But there is a field of white flowers
that look like big bloated cotton balls
Untouched and unopened
For me I appreciate that you have asked
no questions and have been
very accepting of my whorishness